Heal A Wounded Heart
by Sharon Roth-Lichtenfeld, CPC, ELI-MP, BFA

Grief is a normal reaction to a loss. Heartache is the effect of the wound that is in your heart.  It is a partnership, and the pain is inevitable. As a result of the deep, intense emotions and feelings it feels out of control, like you are going crazy. You are not, you are experiencing grief and heartache.

Think of it like a wound that we have on our physical bodies. The difference is that a wounded heart cannot be seen. Now, if you don’t take care of the physical wound, it will become infected, take a long time to heal or never truly heal. Heartache and grief are the same.

Healing from heartache and grief involves being willing to hurt more now in order to someday hurt less. It is the process of going through- not over, around, or under. Just like a physical wound, with care the process of mending begins and eventually a scar forms. The scar is the reminder of the event. Like a physical scar as it fades, the wound to our heart can fade as you heal and re-learn how to live once again.

So how can you begin to heal your wounded heart?

Honor, Express, Learn and Practice or better known as H • E • L • P™

Honor how the pain of your loss is surfacing. Pay attention to your emotions and feelings. Acknowledging and validating them is the first step towards awareness. They are real and you are normal. Remember emotions and feelings are honored guests and they ebb and flow.

Express and experience your emotions, feelings and thoughts. It is a rollercoaster ride with many twists and turns. Expressing eases the pain and begins the process of healing. Crying, journaling, writing, listening to music, art, talking to someone, support groups are some ways that you can express and experience your emotions in healthy ways.

Learn how to raise your awareness. Knowing yourself and how you operate is extremely valuable. Pay attention to how the wound is healing. Use your core strengths and apply it to coping tools and skills. Learn what is working and what is not. Take responsibility and action for healing yourself. 

Practice awareness, coping strategies, actions and healing thoughts. Put a support plan in place, whether it is hourly, daily, weekly or monthly. Practice what makes you feel better.  Be patient grief has no timeline.
Time can heal, however it is what you do with the time that helps you heal.

Sharon Roth-Lichtenfeld, CPC, ELI-MP, BFA is a Certified Professional Life Coach. She specializes in supporting people and caregivers who experience a life-changing event, such as, catastrophic illness, divorce, special needs, death of a loved one.

With over 20 years experience with cancer, caregiver, divorce and special needs, Sharon has “lived the experience”. She brings caring, passion and compassion to her clients through workshops, one-on-one coaching and tele-classes so they thrive in the face of change and adversity.

Sharon can be reached at Sharon@goodgriefcoaching.com or http://www.goodgriefcoaching.com/.